Humour may be hard to translate, but with xkcd’s life-altering Duty Calls, someone had to try.
你还不上床？ nǐ hái bù shàngchuáng？
等会儿。手头有要紧事。děnghuìr。shǒutóu yǒu yàojǐn shì。
你说什么？ nǐ shuō shénme？
网上有个人很蠢！ wǎngshàng yǒu ge rén hěnchǔn！
This was part of a class assignment, and it’s been polished by my teacher. Her first choice for the last line was, “网上有个彪子！” But， “彪子 （biāozi） is a little 脏（zāng）” [giggle] “Well, it’s not that 脏” [giggle giggle] “just a little.” [more giggling]